Friday, April 10, 2009

Wendypedia

Today's profound thought of the day: How many acronyms can the average human brain remember?

Does anybody know? I think mine holds about 11 max. Now, I'm not talking about the acronyms that actually make sense and are widely used in the texting world (BTW, TTFN, OMG). I'm talking about the acronyms that I am making up in order to retain word for word dialogue for 26 yoga postures. BUT the tricky thing is that for some of the postures, one posture is actually comprised of 3 parts! So it's really 198 postures when counting all of the parts. OK, I'm exagerating but my brain has communicated to me that unless I purchase additional GB's of memory from Best Buy asap, it is going on strike.

I don't blame my brain (we have a love/hate relationship). Sometimes my brain is sharp as a tack and can recall the exact outfit (including jewelry & hair) that I wore on my first date with my boyfriend over two years ago. When my brain and I are on the same wave length (or cell length), we co-exist in harmony, giving each other HIGH 5's when we recall details about location, hair styles, and conversations from 8 years ago. Like any relationship, sometimes we don't get along. There are stormy, gloomy, rainy days like today where my brain is protesting, "ENOUGH!".

So back to the acronyms...here's an example of what my brain is refusing to store.

LPMIAC

LPMIAC stands for the first word of each line in the Backward Bending posture (there's more to it...but I spare you the details).

L = Lower
P = Push
M = Maximum
I = Inhale
A = Arms
C = Come

Instead of my brain looking at "L" and saying, "AH HA! That means LOWER! DUH!" it is responding with "Look!" or "Little!" or "Last!"....(you get the picture). Pretty much EVERY word that begins with an "L" in the entire dialogue except the correct word. Instead of doing what it's supposed to do, my brain is in la la land, making up definitions for the acronyms. According to WENDYPEDIA...

LPMIAC (pronounced "LIP-ME-AHK"): "To agressively smack one's lips together in an attempt to create an attractive noise that entices a member of the opposite sex that is twice one's age."

Used in a sentence: "An engaged Paris Hilton sparked fierce rumours when she was caught on cellphone video Lpmiacing George Clooney at the Whiskey Bar in Hollywood."

We can also use LPMIAC as a noun, adjective,.....oh the possibilities. I will stop and take this as a hint that I should drop the studying and watch a nice movie.