mathematical calculations

Tonight, I was teaching my 8:30pm class and after the students did Half Tortoise pose, I shared that according to Bikram 30 seconds in that posture is equivalent to 8hours of relaxation. We do two sets of each posture so while the students were resting, I thought, "Well, 60 seconds of the posture would be equivalent to 16 hours of sleep, right?" Who needs sleep? After watching Conan O' Brien, do one set (30 sec) of Half Tortoise and you are good to go until 8:30AM. Do another set (30 sec) of Half Tortoise and you don't even need to spend $4 on a latte. In fact, you are not due for another until 4:30PM! I value my sleep so I'm not ready to be the guinea pig for this experiment. Feel free to try it - after all, the posture was named "Half Tortoise" because tortoises live hundreds and hundreds of years.

I was on a hot roll with math (usually my weak spot)...so I calculated the number of classes I'd have to teach in order to avoid foreclosure. Here are the results:

63 classes a month,
16 classes a week,
2 classes per day 7 days a week OR
3 classes per day working 5 days a week.

This is assuming I have health insurance but does NOT account for food, grooming expenses, toilet paper, gas, etc. OUCH!!! I have 3 classes each week (soon to be 7 total). I would need to more than double the number of classes I teach each week. Double the classes without funds for food or deodorant. Not a healthy combo.

Knock me upside the head! I need another job. This is a tough reality check. I've been trying to avoid being dragged back to the cubicle, only to be chained up and force fed pringles all day while I stare at a computer in a zombie like trance. Unemployment has been unkind to me and is running out. What's the mega million jackpot at?

Lights, camera, ACTION!!!

Well...sort of.

Not quite filming a movie, but I do have some semi-thrilling NEWS to report!

So remember Keri? The blog queen that started a massive pink slip movement? Well, guess who made the front page of The Seattle Times yesterday? Ms. Housepants herself.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2009471899_leisure15m.html

I stopped reading the paper when I went away to training so my boyfriend came running into the house shouting, "Hey babe - look who made the cover? Your friend, Keri!" I was so excited!

You see, since I was a little girl, I have always been fascinated with celebrities. Even the ones on the B list. When I was 11, I signed up for a subscription to People magazine. Back then we didn't have Access Hollywood so you had to pay for juicy celebrity gossip. When my first edition of People arrived, my heart was pounding as I snatched it out of the mailbox. It was gonna be a good one, nice and thick, full of hearty gossip! My parents didn't know I had ordered a subscription so I hid the magazine underneath my shirt and quickly snuck back into my room. I would turn each page very slowly - I didn't want the magazine to end! I suppose being consumed by famous people's lives allowed me to escape my own life. To this day, I'm perplexed at how I kept getting magazine after magazine...without paying a dime (um, I had curfew at 3:30pm. How could I possibly make money?)

I'm going to get Keri's autograph because she is blowin' up! She was on KOMO news, countless websites, Seattle Times...pretty soon, I'll be watching her in the hot seat with Larry King.

AND because of Keri's exposure, a writer from The Seattle Times (Pacific Magazine) contacted me and interviewed me for an article on unemployment! It's going to be published on Labor Day - great timing, eh? I never ever ever thought I would get exposure for being jobless in house pants.

I'm a pretty private person so I'm surprised at myself when I get excited about being in the spotlight. I guess I have a secret craving to be in People. :)